Last week I had two near-death experiences. The first was at my home waiting for an ambulance transport to the hospital. The second was a few days later where I sat on the table in the ER, blood pouring out of my face with a team of well trained nurses and doctors surrounding me. They worked like a well-oiled machine, the different parts quickly attending to the different jobs. It was chaotic in the room, but there was an undeniable presence of something bigger. Angelic in its energy and necessary for my life's understanding.
As I came in and out of consciousness, I had a remarkable experience. I had conversations with my elders, my divine masculine side, and the Universe. I received downloads of necessary information for my spiritual awakening process. Pieces of wisdom that I need to embrace in order to come back to my life here on Earth.
I have struggled with the discomfort of being on the planet for most of my existence. It has felt too hard to comprehend: How can there be war? Or the way many humans treat Mother Earth with the unnecessary destruction and disrespect of the natural world. The entitlement mankind wields around, mistakenly believing we are above the divine order of nature. I have longed to live in a time when things are in harmony or at least more balanced. I have never been able to understand why there is so much suffering on this planet, when it could be so. much. better.
While I don't have those answers yet, I did receive transformative information through this experience. Information that will help me be on the planet with less suffering in my own life. The ER scene wasn't pretty but the messages were astoundingly beautiful. I would like to share them with you, in case they might help you along your awakening process, too.
You are not alone.
My feet stood on a threshold and it was beautiful out there. It was as if I could free fall into the stars of my home. It was familiar and comforting and welcoming, but I wanted to stay here and I asked to remain on earth. A small childlike angel hugged my belly, also asking me to stay. These are my four conditions, my four agreements to return to my earthly existence.
My Four Agreements:
Let go of self-criticism. You are a soul who has asked to be here in human form. Your purpose is to be the joy, love and light that you ALREADY are. There is no greater purpose. Your life mission isn't going to fit into a definition or a box you can check. Your life purpose is YOUR LIFE.
You are already perfect. Perfectionism is a ghost, please stop chasing it. You remember what it is like in other times where things are harmonious, it is not harmonious on earth right now and it is not your fault nor your job to fix it. Be your human self and shine brightly. Fully experience this lifetime because it will be over soon. All will be fine.
Caffeine is poison. The sparkling jolt of electricity that you feel with your one cup of half-caff is actually YOUR energy, just being pushed out unnaturally fast. It leaves you depleted for the rest of the day. Your adrenals are tired and asking to rest. Just because caffeine works for many other people, doesn't mean it works for you anymore. It is poison to your system. Allow your natural rhythms to reveal themselves to you again and you will be pleasantly surprised how lovely life in your own skin feels once more.
Fear. Do not fear death. It is not scary. It is as natural as the sunrise, the wind in the trees, the birth of your baby. It is returning home and it is awaiting your arrival. There is nothing to fear.
My arms are black and blue from the multiple IVs, blood draws and transfusions. My nose is packed after emergency surgery for a posterior arterial hemorrhage and my body is exhausted from excessive blood loss. But my spirit is stronger than ever. I am grateful for the profound growth and new understanding.
There is an easier way for all of us to live our lives and it truly begins with self-love. Remembering we are beautiful, exquisite, perfect love.
Love yourself and love your life.
We will all be returning home one day.
Let us be kind to ourselves and our world.
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