I had an epiphany last weekend during a meditation retreat. By the way, I think 'retreat' is a little misleading. From my experience, it is a ton of inner work. Self transformation at its roots. Powerful and unearthing and worth every second, I want to call it a meditation intensive instead. I couldn't form words for at least 3 days afterwards.
My epiphany is this:
Our inner radiance is spectacular. Immeasurable. Beautiful beyond words. And it seems like a lot of us keep it locked away. Almost pushed to the back corner of our being, afraid to let it show. At least this is how I have felt. Maybe this resonates with you, too?
What's there to be afraid of?
Being vulnerable. Being seen. Known. Open. Transparent.
Up until this point, these have been valid fears of mine and remaining unobtrusive seemed necessary in the past. And it worked well to keep me under the radar of vulnerability and criticism most of the time. But times are a changing and I like it!
In the same moment, I was overcome with an image of white glittering light, like one of those giant sparklers on the 4th of July, right inside my chest. Sparkling 360 degrees around me. It was captivating. Brilliant. Expansive. Powerful. I loved how it felt.
Realizing this is within me and each one of us all of the time, the question arose:
How different would our experience of life be if we walked throughout our days knowing we have this inner radiance? Owning it. Claiming it. Bravely sharing it.
I think we would all walk taller, too.
It takes more effort trying to keep a lid on our radiance than it takes to simply let it out. There is energy within this release process that I didn't know existed and it is bringing profound changes to my life. Sustained energy throughout the day. An ability to truly listen to what someone is saying. Thoughts that are clear and communicated with ease. A grace within my inner workings in the form of kind and gentle self talk.
I've decided to give it a go. I'd say 'experiment with it' but that would mean I'm undecided if this way of life is for me or not. And I am certain that being vulnerable, authentic and radiant is the new normal.
Life feels more exhilarating. Like I am a little kid the night before my birthday party. Or a new mama waiting for the birth of my child. We've been connected for a long time but haven't seen one another yet. The anticipation of the beautiful experiences and upcoming connections makes it hard to fall asleep.
There is a new energy in life, carrying a strong undercurrent of bliss and hope throughout each day. It feels bouyant. Promising and honest.
Can you feel it, too?
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